I just realized...I have only five more days to sing the song

"I am 16 going on 17" and have it actually apply to me

I've waited for this year my whole singing in the car life
ever since I've watched Sound of Music
and I wasted an entire year not being able to sing it.

and now I only have five more days :[

(Rolf)
You wait little girl
On an empty stage
For fate to turn the light on

Your life little girl
is an empty page
that men will want to write on

(Leisl)
To write on

(Rolf)
You are 16 going on 17
Baby its time to think
Better beware
Be canny and careful
Baby you're on the brink

You are 16 going on 17
Fellows will fall in line
Eager young lads
And grueways and cads
Will offer you fruit and wine

Totally unprepared are you
To face a world of men
Timid and shy and scared are you
Of things beyond your ken

You need someone
Older and wiser
Telling you what to do
I am 17 going on 18
I'll take care of you

(Leisl)
I am 16 going on 17
I know that i'm naive
Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet
And willingly I believe

I am 16 going on 17 innocent as a rose
Bachelor dandies
Drinkers of brandies
What do I know of those

Totally unprepared am I
To face a world of men
Timid and shy and scared am I
Of things beyond my ken

I need someone
Older and wiser
Telling me what to do
You are 17 going on 18
I'll depend on you


mm now all I'm missing is my own Rolf ;D
haha jks
but really--growing up is just something that I'm scared that I'm not ready to do yet.
its inevitable but i want to cling on to these last precious moments of innocence and childhood.
I'm not saying I want to be gullible or naive, not knowing what's occurring in the world.

But I want to be able to grasp and hold that slipping faith and first trust in everyone without worrying if they will mug me, judge me, trick me, or hurt me.

I am 16 going on 17
and I'm a little girl on an empty stage
waiting for fate to turn my light on.

My New Muse

from this:



To That:







This girl is unbelievable
I open up to yahoo! news and it's not her face that I see first.
It's the words:

old dresses made new

the next words I read were:

for $1

HOLA AMIGA PERFECTA

her blog is called new dress a day where she creates a new fashion piece every single day for 365 days for $1 a day.
so thats 365 dresses. 365 days. $365.
forget the movie 27 dresses--this is tons better

not only is she doing what I had spent four long years dreaming of doing (fashion designing)
but she was doing it cheaply appealing greatly to my frugal sense AND she was doing it while recycling!

how great is that?
fashion design, cheap, and recycling all wrapped up into one great package.

I think I'm in heaven..no joke, this blog she does is so..me, or at least the one that I'd dream I'd be when I was in middle school.

This inspires me to draw so badly..take out my old sketchpads and create..
thats whats great about art: you can take something that no one wants and make it beautiful

chet it out (heh..borrowing tinny's phrase x])

http://newdressaday.wordpress.com/

Where Do I Go From Here

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfTieVPjN7E

The earth is cold, the fields are bare
The branches fold against the wind that's everywhere
The birds move on so they survive
When snow's so deep the bears all sleep to keep themselves alive
They do what they must for now and trust in their plan
If I trust in mine, somehow I might find who I am

But where do I go from here?
So many voices ringing in my ear
Which is the voice that I was meant to hear?
How will I know where do I go from here?

My world has changed, and so have I
I've learned to choose and even learned to say good-bye
The path ahead, so hard to see
It winds and bends, but where it ends depends on only me
In my heart I don't feel part of so much I've known
Now it seems it's time to start a new life on my own

But where do I go from here?
So many voices ringing in my ear
Which is the voice I was meant to hear?
How will I know, where do I go from here?

Pure Joy

Thank you Lord
Thank you thank you THANK YOU THANK YOU
thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

God, you lift my burdens always
you ease my heart
I've prayed for pure unadulterated joy in you Lord
I haven't had that burning joy in life for such a long time Lord
and when I realized it..we prayed for it in devo group

Today I was feeling so tired after playing
I've been sad over certain things for quite a while and they've really just been bearing on my heart and I haven't been able to be truly fully 100% joyful in praising God for a while.

But all of sudden today,
I found myself prancing around the room, being a ballerina, a hiphopper, a korean girl pop musician, a swing dancer, a gymnast who was doing somersaults onto her bed like a little kid.
interpretive dance, michael jackson moves..hugging and kissing my teddy bear randomly and making him my partner.
I didn't care what neighbors saw me through the open windows. I probably looked like a psycho but it didn't matter in the least tiny bit, because I was flying in my own mind.

I dont know what came over me

All I could feel was this burning joy, like flash fire. and then before I knew it I was praising God, praying with a whole heart, loving this joy He had bestowed upon me.
It's so amazing that I can't even describe it.
All I knew was that after my little dancing episode--i just had to record it down and just exult the Lord for his glory.

so THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU GOD LORD FATHER KING..
THANK YOU.

my heart feels so free right now, and this feeling is freedom itself. Freedom from worry and pain that I've been feeling for so long. You've granted me this joy so I can praise you freely Lord

THANK YOU

There's a reason why my blog is called...aqua.

There's a reason why my blog is called
aqua. jambalaya. summer. me♥

Aqua, turquoise, mint, it doesn't matter. The perfect combination of white, blue, and green can sometimes simply take my breath away.
The sound of aqua just reminds you of the Gulf coast. No, none of those salty brown waterside beaches along the Atlantic Ocean, but the clear blue waters of the Gulf side.

That my friends, is aqua.

aquamarine. mermaids. A world of sea blue that is salty and sweet all at the same time.
Can you not feel it?

But beneath the surface, aqua is so much deeper than that. It's playful on the top but dark and brooding below the waves. You never know what you're going to find.

If anything, when I'm feeling too much of any other color, I can come back to this one and feel at home, like I don't have to change myself in order to fit with the assumptions behind other colors.
With pink, I feel giddy, but one has to eventually get serious.
With red, I feel bold and daring, yet you have no idea how much of a chicken I am.
With white, I feel pure, and yet that's a lie because I'm the worst sinner..I'm dirty.
With Yellow, I feel the Georgia blaze across my face but winter always quells the sun.
With Orange...let's face it..no one feels anything with the color orange.
With Green..I'm at the peak of my environmentalism, never wasting anything,then there's reality
With Blue...straight up blue that is--its the night, not black..and the night swallows you up then spits you back out just in time to wake up from the dream.
With purple...I feel on top of the world, arrogant...and then I am humbled.
With Brown....I am stagnant, lazy, a potato colored rebecca..yet I have to move to live right?
With Black...I think of eyes..is that weird? My eyes are not brown, they are black and they are the windows to myself..but does anyone really know his or her self? If not, then why don't we all just stare wide eyed into our mirrors? It's too puzzling to be comfortable.


With aqua--I imagine heaven too to be that color. A heavenly northern lights of varying shades of aqua rippling as the angels sing.

sky and ocean. the first two things of God's creation---all cradled within this one seemingly simple and ordinary color. Remember it well.
A-Q-U-A